Drag Teen by Jeffery Self

Author:Jeffery Self [Self, Jeffery]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Young Adult, GLBT, Contemporary, Romance, Humor
Publisher: Scholastic Press
Published: 2016-04-26T07:00:00+00:00

WE WEREN’T CRAZY ABOUT DRIVING again in Manhattan, so we left the car where it was and took a mind-blowingly expensive cab over to the mysterious-sounding XXXL, which turned out to be a not-so-mysterious enormous gay club. And when I say enormous gay club, I mean really enormous, like the Epcot of gay bars. Even from outside I knew this was going to be a lot for me to handle; if the tiny dive in South Carolina had sent me into a dramatic tailspin of insecurity, I imagined this place would ignite a hurricane. A line was wrapped around the building, full of ridiculously attractive gay men.

“This line will take hours, you guys,” Seth said, surveying just how far down the block the parade of gays went. “Let’s try going to the front and asking for Lady Rooster.”

“We can’t break in line!” I panicked. “These people will kill us. Besides, that guy at the door is checking IDs. They’re not going to let any of us in there.”

“Call Lady Rooster back and tell her we’re outside.”

Heather was laughing. “Is anyone else aware of how ridiculous it is that we keep having to say the name Lady Rooster in a serious way?” She shook her head in awe. “Gay people are great.”

I tried calling Lady Rooster again but didn’t get an answer. I sent a text—Hey. This is JT who called earlier. We’re outside the club—but she didn’t reply. We waited for half an hour as the line got shorter and shorter. Most of the guys checked out Seth on their way in, and I tried not to notice, deciding I had enough to worry about for one night. Finally, a side door was kicked open with a sharp orange heel; then a ball of orange and red feathers poked out. After a second I realized there was a face in the middle of it. From the costume alone, there was no question that this was Lady Rooster.

“You!” She pointed at me. “You the one blowing up my phone?”

I sheepishly walked over to her.

“Yeah, I’m JT Barnett. I’m in the pageant and we just got to town and we don’t have anywhere to stay and—”

“Ugh. I’m on in five minutes. Lady Rooster doesn’t normally let girls back here, but just stand where nobody can see you,” she spat, giving Heather a less than welcoming look. “Get your asses in here.”

She darted back inside, moving slightly like an actual rooster. I wasn’t sure whether it was intentional or the product of the enormous cocktail she clutched in her talonlike fingers. We followed her into a grungy hallway, the graffitied walls literally pulsating from the loud music in the club. At the end of the hall was a large room crammed full of decorations for every possible holiday, and a tower of beer kegs.

I heard an announcer revving up the crowd, introducing the host of the evening’s party, the one and only Lady Rooster. The crowd was going wild.

“You three wait here—and if you steal anything, Lady Rooster will know it.

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